It’s time to face the facts. I’m still struggling to get into a daily routine with our Munchkin, but I really need to see where I’m at in terms of weight, getting healthy and all that jazz.

I started blogging about my weight loss journey at a weight of about 139 kg/309 lbs and 5′9”, if I remember correctly. I actually dropped a few kilos before I got pregnant. When I did find out I was going to be a mommy, I stopped recording my weight on a regular basis, because I did not want to pressure myself in that area while I was helping our little Munchkin grow. A few days ago then, I weighed in at 118 kg/ 260 lbs. I am surprised, pleased and scared at this number. While I absolutely love that I am a ‘mere’ 18 kg/40 lbs away from the double digits at the moment, I am not comfortable with the fact that I did absolutely nothing healthy to arrive at this weight. I ate what I wanted during the pregnancy, never paid any attention to calories or fat content, really. When I wanted something, I ate it. Obviously I did not eat anything that was strictly off limits - stuff that could potentially harm our Munchkin -, but other than that, nothing was monitored.

To be honest, I think I will gain all this weight back in a flash once I stop breastfeeding. Right now, my eating habits are really erratic at best. Whenever I nurse our fella, I get intense cravings. Really, really intense cravings. More often than not, I still eat what I want when I want it. However, since I am seemingly burning a hell of a lot of calories through breastfeeding alone, I am managing to maintain my weight at the moment. All this lost weight and effortless maintaing scares me - I really do think it’s extremely unnatural, it just can’t last.

That said, starting tomorrow, I will pay better attention to my food intake. I do know my biggest problem is and always has been chocolate. I’ve been trying to gradually switch to darker chocolate - I’ve even tried 70% cocoa solids, but that’s not for me just yet. I am comfortable at 56% right now, slowly inching my way up. I do believe that darker chocolate is healthier than milk chocolate and I also can’t eat as much of it. Tricking myself, so to speak. Also, I am trying to pay attention to the quality of the chocolate I consume. Other than that, I now try to stay away from other sweets as much as I can, thereby reducing my sugar intake considerably. Proper meals are a totally different story, but I have to do this step by step - when I look at the big picture, at what I really need to change or adjust, I do feel slightly overwhelmed. So, making my preferred chocolate darker it is.

As for exercise, well…I will probably forever have a problem with that. At least I am going for daily walks with Munchkin now, which is a big improvement and makes us both feel good. I will have to think about what else I can do soon. But…baby steps, Lassie, baby steps. Don’t get ahead of yourself.

Anyway, I am officially back in the healthy living and eating business, if not necessarily back to the extremely strict weight loss program yet - after all, I am still nursing and diets are not recommended. So I will focus on healthier choices for now.

I hope you’re all doing great out there!

This entry was posted on Sunday, August 17th, 2008 at 9:07 pm and is filed under Weight Pill. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.